The Stoic Simple Blog

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from Phil Van Treuren

It’s just a fact of life that we’re not going to hit all the targets we aim for. But Stoicism teaches us that hitting the target isn’t the important part. The reason is simple: because whether or not you hit what you’re aiming for isn’t totally in your control.

No matter how well you aim, lots of stuff could go wrong after you shoot your arrow. The wind could blow it off target, a bird could fly in its path, whatever.

For a Stoic person, what matters is all the stuff we do right up until we shoot the arrow. The training, the studying, the preparation. That’s all stuff that’s in our control.

Your actions might be up to you, but the outcomes are not. So stop judging yourself on whether or not you hit your targets. Instead, focus on how well you prepared for it. Focus on the process, not the outcome.

We might prefer to hit our targets, and if you do, that’s great. Just don’t forget: we can’t always succeed, but we can do something even better: we can deserve to succeed.

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from Phil Van Treuren

Getting scared by stuff that jumps out at us or is strange to us is a natural part of being human, but Epictetus said we should never let the force of our initial impressions carry us away.

He said that you should consider every impression you have, and say to it: “Okay, hold on a minute, let’s see what you really are. Let’s put you to the test.”

An impression could be something that pops up without your control, like when someone jumps out and scares you.

But you can also have impressions about stuff that you’ve never experienced before: like facing challenges, growing older, or other inevitable things that have always scared you.

As human beings, we have the awesome ability to think about our impressions and decide whether they’re accurate or overblown. If there’s something that scares you, ask yourself whether it’s just because you haven’t experienced it yet.

You have the power to shape your impressions . . . not some silly mask.

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from Phil Van Treuren

Epictetus said that there are objects in your life that you might enjoy, but it’s important to remember what they really are. He gives the example of a cup . . . if you like a specific cup, you should remind yourself that it’s really just some ceramic and paint. That way, if it ever breaks, you won’t be as upset.

Try applying that to things that might seem more important, too. If you’re proud of the house you live in, then tell yourself, “I’m really just proud of some wood, brick and drywall.”

And finally, when you kiss someone you love, tell yourself, “I’m kissing a human being, who could someday be taken away from me by stuff I don’t control.”

It’s always tough to lose someone you love. But reminding yourself that we’re all just mortals can make it a bit easier to handle whatever the future brings.

https://www.stoicsimple.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/09/stars-1.mp4

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A poem by Phil Van Treuren

Today, at last, I escape your grasp—
Or rather, I choose to remove you . . .
For within me were your hazards laid,
Dressed up as rightness and virtue.
I’ll always love your brightest facets—
Sparks that forged more noble worlds;
But I refuse to greet my countrymen
With hatred’s flag unfurled.

Your beauty rests in dialogue,
Consensus, and debate;
In viewing rivals as opponents—
Not mere enemies to hate.
You augment both the greatest
And the worst things in mankind;
Raised the pillars of democracy—
Groomed corruption, slander, guile.

You birthed Cato, Lincoln, Churchill—
So, too, men of villainy, and worse;
Those Catalines, Tweeds, and Stalins
Who litter history’s long course.
And though each generation
Thinks you’re some new lucid thing,
In truth, your color flared the same
When Romulus was king.

All duties will I answer still
To nation and neighborhood,
And muster for community
What bolsters common good.
But no more will your clout compel
My opinion on each event;
No longer will my faith be bound
By “with me” and “against.”

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“A gem cannot be polished without friction, nor a man perfected without trials” is a famous quote from the Stoic philosopher Seneca, who was also a Roman statesman, playwright and politician.

“It’s not that we have a short time to live, but that we waste much of it” is a famous quote from the Stoic philosopher Seneca, who was also a Roman statesman, playwright and politician.

“All cruelty springs from weakness” is a famous quote from the Stoic philosopher Seneca, who was also a Roman statesman, playwright and politician.